Glencoe Beach

We had a BLAST on Sunday with Parker's cousins, Michaela, Finn, and Noelle, and Aunt Michelle and Uncle Sean.  We went to lunch and then hit Glencoe Beach on Lake Michigan.  It was our first time going to one of the lake beaches near Chicago, and we loved it! This summer has been so hot that the water was actually refreshing instead of frigid.  Parker loved going in and splashing and swimming with his cousins.  We will definitely go back!

Summer Close...

As summer time dwindles, I reach that overly-ambitious time of year.  The (short) time where I am re-energized, ready to tackle the major projects at work and home.  It is the rose-colored glasses time, where I am excited, nervous, and ready.  I always pack in way too many things to do during this time.  Education Twitter chats at 9pm? Sure! Volunteer for another committee to plan an educational conference? Awesome! Join more committees at school? Of course! Ask if there is anything I can do to help Parker's teachers? Why not?! 

For whatever reason, this time of year, I am an especially eager "yes-man" (or more accurately, yes-woman).  I always over-commit and pay for it later in the year (usually Spring, when all projects seem to overlap).  I struggle so much with loving the work that I do and wanting to improve in it, and loving being a Mommy, Wife, and Friend, and wanting to get better at those too.  There simply aren't enough hours in the day for everything!

For this year, it is my goal to find balance.  I hope to try and be more thoughtful about what I volunteer for, and also to not feel guilty when I decide to sit and play a game, read a (fun) book, or watch a TV show instead of doing one of those productive things.  The guilt is what really kills me about being a mom.  Does that ever go away? Probably not.

I'm sure next summer's end will bring a similar post, but I can at least keep trying to prioritize and balance time amongst all parts of my life.

Fun at the Drive IN

One of our most favorite summer activities has become going to the Drive In.  It is a wonderfully nostalgic place that is always full of friendly people and fun times, even if we only make it through the first movie.  

This last time, in an act of sheer lunacy, we brought both dogs with us.  They got TONS of attention and both loved and hated it at the same time.  Not sure if we will do that again :)

It is a nice pseudo date night for Matt and I.  We don't need a babysitter, but Parker usually falls asleep in his car seat by the time the movie starts.  So much fun.

Craziness with Emi

Say "Hi" to Emi! I feel so guilty not writing about her sooner! Somewhere in the evolution of this blog, I've forgotten to post about the just-plain-fun things that we are up to.  In an effort to revert back to this being our FAMILY blog, meet Emi.  We got her on June 30th, in a half-planned, half-whimsical decision.  

When we first got Chase, who, believe it or not, is now 7.5 years old, we had planned on breeding him. Ha. Welp, life happened, and we are never going to breed him.  But, we've always thought that he deserves a friend.  He has been put through a lot in his 7 years.  He has dealt with 3 moves, long distance, a baby (who rightfully took up a LOT of our attention), and very long work days from us.  He has grown into a very loyal, somewhat curmudgeony middle-aged man.  He doesn't do a great job with kids, and definitely doesn't do well with other male dogs.  I got some nasty looks from a mom in the park the other day when Chase bared teeth at her retriever who wanted to play.  Sorry, guys.  I so badly want him to be nice, sweet, and cuddly, but that isn't him. I love him anyway.

Long story long, we really felt like Chase deserved a playmate.  We found a woman in our town who is a dog broker of sorts- she takes a few puppies from a few breeders' litters, and sells them from her home.  We saw Emi the morning of the 30th, and thought she was beautiful, but pretty timid.  We couldn't decide if we should get another Shiba Inu, or get a teddy bear (fluffy, no shedding, lots of yapping, lots of cuddling).  Obviously, you know our choice.  She was unnamed for a few days- but we finally decided on Emi, because it Japanese for "blessing." (Shibas are a Japanese breed).

Chase pretty much hates us right now :) Emi is energetic (though nothing like Chase when he was a puppy), and her most favorite thing ever is pestering him.  His only hope is high spaces that she can't jump to yet.

We love her, and despite the pain it is to train a dog, she is worth our effort.  

Aqua Therapy & Innovative Therapists

I have to give huge shout outs to Parker's therapy team.  Over the last few weeks they have each been especially innovative with Parker in moments of need.  My last post mentioned Ms. Deanna, our Speech Therapist, using aquarium tubing to get around Parker's tendency to bite straws.  Ms. Vicki, Parker's OT, has been using Therapeutic Listening with us to try and give Parker some additional body stability and awareness.  This week, it was Ms. Julie's turn (and her intern, Sarah).  

Every other week, we drive about 20 minutes north to Wisconsin for Aqua OT/Aqua Therapy.  It is a decent production-- the pool is at a HUGE rec-plex, and getting Parker ready for swimming takes some time.  While waiting at the pool this week, Ms. Julie informed us that because of a sanitation incident (aka: toddler poo!), that the pool wouldn't be ready for Parker to swim in until nearly the end of our session.  Instead of just sitting and waiting (keeping Parker still while near water- his most favorite thing - and near a wet, slippery floor would've been hell), or cancelling our session, Ms. Julie had us drive over to the small rec-plex lake, and did OT there.  That's right. Parker got to do aqua-OT in a lake! How fun!

These ladies are responsible for a huge amount of Parker's progress.  When I am ready to throw in the towel, or am frustrated with his behavior, they come swooping in with new, great things to try.

#thankful.

Hearing & Tubes & Straws, Oh My!

 Unfortunately, due to scheduling issues at Lurie, we had to cut out Parker's ophthalmology evaluation to get his hearing test and tubes done before the end of November.  Thankfully, Parker's hearing is normal and the tubes (normal sized this time!) went in wonderfully.  I am disappointed we missed the opportunity to get a really close look at Parker's vision, though.  I just could not risk waiting until November in case Parker had a hearing issue.  Hopefully, they will find another opportunity to do this.  

What we've learned at this point is that we need to work on clear annunciation when we speak to Parker.  He is having trouble distinguishing sounds that differentiate similar words

This summer in speech has really been spent on working with a straw and drinking from a cup.  Parker still gets the majority of his liquids from bottles, which is getting to be taboo for a 3.5 year old.  We are going to schedule a follow-up video swallow study soon to see if/how much progress has been made since last year.  We are really hoping to lose the thickening powder we are supposed to use for Parker's liquids from a cup. 

Our AWESOME speech therapist, Ms. Deanna, came up with an innovative way to get around Parker's tendency to bite straws.  We are currently using aquarium tubing to practice blowing bubbles in liquids that either taste super yummy (chocolate milk, which P has never had before), or colorful water.  After "accidentally" sucking inward a few times, Parker has figured out how to suck in intentionally.  This is HUGE. We are hoping to keep practicing that so that he is able to drink from a straw soon. Look out, Home Depot. We might clear you out of your aquarium tubes! 

The "ack-gack" and "suss"

Parker is learning new words every week, with a major focus on summer time.  This child is so obsessed with getting to school! Every night he asks to get his back-pack ("ack-gack") on and will sit in front of any door.  It has a clip in the front that he is working on trying himself, and he refuses to remove the back-pack for bed time.  I'm pretty sure it is the same size as him!  

He also LOVES the bus ("suss"), and his driver, Miss Pam.  She is such a sweet lady with a hard job! When the bus roles around the corner, I have to be sure to have a firm grip on Parker's hand, because he takes off running!  Thankfully, my feelings don't get too hurt but his excitement to get on the bus (and leave), because when the bus rolls around to drop him off, he starts smiling, yelling, and kicking the bus window.  

We are working hard on getting the beginning sounds of words with him-- repetition, repetition, repetition.  Right now, whenever we stress the "B" sound at the beginning of bus, Parker will say "buh-suss."  When we stress the "M" sound at the beginning of milk, Parker will say "mmm-gohk."  Needless to say, it is a work in progress.

I love this boy.  Even though it has nothing to do with Matt and I, I'm proud of how happy he is all the time.  It is a lesson for all of us to not take life too seriously.  

Thankful.

Tonight was a good night. On this special needs journey, I've discovered that other kids are often more intimidating to me than adults. Kids ask hard, blunt questions like: why can't he talk? what are on his shoes? etc. My challenge is coming up with age appropriate responses and managing the unpredictable, while fighting the urge to protect Parker from any possible pain or cruelty.  There are moments where I just want to whisk him away, and keep him holed up in our safe family bubble.

Tonight, Parker played with a little boy at the park, which honestly always makes me a little anxious. This little boy's sister, who is wheel-chair bound with significant special needs, had enjoyed the swings with us earlier in the evening.  This little girl was so beautiful--like Parker, you could tell that the swings were the best part of her day.  Her Grandma, there with her and her four siblings, was an incredibly happy, larger-than-life woman.  It was energizing just to be near them.

For the first time, I could really say Parker played WITH this little boy, not near him. Parker followed him, mimicked him, laughed with him, and was independent. He went down the big boy slide by himself. This little boy (maybe 4?) waited for Parker down the slide, helped him off the edge and up the steps, and let him slide first -- all without saying a word.

Tonight, I am humbled by a 4 year old. I am solidified in my understanding that Parker (and others with special needs) inspire kindness, empathy, and HEART in us all. And in turn, we get to pay that kindness forward. I love that.

Tonight, I am most thankful for a sweet child who innately looked out for my baby-turned-big-boy.  I hope we see him again at the park soon.  I hope that we meet many more children that have this kindness in them.

I so badly want to post a photo of this sweet boy's face, but out of respect to his family whom I don't know, I'll leave it at this.  Even here, you can see him waiting at the top of the slide for Parker to reach him. I wanted to hug this kid!

Are We Doing Enough?

Today is my only day off this week, and I am still hoping to spend much of it cleaning and catching up on some of the things I haven't done all year, like organizing closets and such (later).  But an article caught my attention today, and drove me deep into the never-ceasing, always-hovering question..."Are we doing enough?"  This damn question haunts me.  All.The.Time.  From therapies, to equipment, to supplements, to activities, etc.  I'm never quite sure if it is the right "stuff."  Nights that we lounge on the couch and watch The Wiggles are barraged with guilt about all of the skills we should be practicing. The guilt never stops.

The challenge of parenting in the 21st century is the endless access to information, opinions, and then some more information and opinions.  I am usually somewhat decent about reading enough to feel informed, and then making an educated decision.   The area of supplements and cognitive research goes outside my comfort zone.  As it is, we debated about using Nutrivene, which is a widely used vitamin powder.  When one of Parker's pediatricians said "If I were in your shoes, I'd be doing the same thing as you" in terms of using it, that was my solidified decision.

We are doing our best to take things day by day, and when needed, weigh the risks and the benefits, and also the opportunity cost of the things we do.  We know that the sometimes 2.5 hours of evening therapy Parker gets a week is at a financial and family-time cost to us, but the benefits of extra practice for him are worth it.  We will continue to be his advocates for life, even when that means making the tough choices and taking some chances.

Summer is within view!

I am just days away from "summer," which in my job, means time to learn, research, and have sporadic meetings and trainings.  I still get a lot of time "off" -but as all teachers know, we are rarely truly off.  In Chicago, summer means going from 62 one day to 94 a few days later.  It gets hard to plan activities, but we will at least be at the pool on those super hot days.

Right now, we are relishing in finally being at the language stage where Matt and I know what Parker is saying, but other people might not yet.  We have waited and worked for so long to get here, though we are just at the beginning stages.  Parker is so interested in speaking (when he wants to), and includes a lot of his own gibberish in the mix.  We are fiercely proud of him.